‘The Secret Lives of Wives’
It’s a matter of endurance. Marriage, that is. In her book, “The Secret Lives of Wives: Women Share What It Really Takes To Stay Married,” Iris Krasnow interviewed 200 women managing to stick it out in long marriages.
“I have found in my collection of wives who remain in long running marriages that the majority of them share these common traits: They have the guts and determination to stick it out, no matter what. And their laments about their marriages aren’t because of anything serious. It’s the subtle nuances of living with one person in one house for a very long time that grates at the soul, and that causes a simmering malaise. It’s the grind of the ordinary that drives people into thinking, ‘Is this all there is? I want more. I want adventure. I want change.’”
So, should you decide to “stick it out,” or call Noud & Noud? Before calling me, ask yourself: “Will I really be better off (emotionally, financially, socially) divorced? Will being single again really make me happier?”If the answer to either of these questions is “No,” divorce may not necessarily be the answer. As Krasnow says: “Who stays married and who doesn’t is a question not always about commitment or deep abiding love — it’s about endurance.” Make sure your capacity for endurance has reached its limit before calling Noud & Noud. But if it has, we can make the fresh start you are looking for a reality.
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